Exploring Autumn

Changes

2011-10-29T21:51:00.000-07:00

Change is in the air.
Change in the season.
Change in my personal life.
Lots and lots of changes ahead.

I'm trying really hard to keep my head above water.
To hold it together.

I'm hopeful
fearful
relieved

but most of all ... I feel alive

For the first time in years I'm being the person I want to be.

And I'm very, very thankful for that.

Easter fun

2011-04-25T19:29:00.000-07:00

We had a nice quiet ... wet Easter.

Macro Monday

2011-04-25T10:18:00.000-07:00

Secrets

2011-02-17T16:08:00.000-08:00

Hi there!! tap, tap, tap... anyone still out there?
I know I haven't been around in almost a year but I started catching myself writing blog post like comments on other peoples blogs. That's when I realized I need to try and get back to this old thing.

My big second grader isn't the baby he used to be. He's thoughtful and talkative. He's becoming his own person and I love who that person is.
Yesterday he came home from school and this was our conversation.

Bug: You might be mad, well I don't think you will but you might be but I'm going to tell you anyway.

Me (getting a little worried): What? What happened?

Bug: L told me not to tell you but I can't not tell you, you know mom I can't keep secrets from you.

Me: Nope no secrets between us, what didn't he want you to tell me?

Bug: Well we traded DSI games for a little while, I let him have Bakugon and he let me take his Tony Hawk game.

Me: Why didn't he want you to tell me THAT?

Bug: I have no idea maybe his parents would be mad.

Me: Well I'm glad you told me even when you thought there was a chance I would be upset, even though I'm not. I love that you know you can trust me with anything.

Ah I love that kid! I hope he always feels that way about me. I always want him to feel he can confide in me. How do I keep him from changing when he becomes a teenager????

Wordless Wednesday ~ Bad Kitty...

2010-05-11T21:47:00.000-07:00

For more wordless Wednesday click HERE

A day with grandpa

2010-04-19T21:26:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago Bug begged me to go see Grandpa. So we called up my dad and he was excited to spend the day with us. His friend was hosting a birthday party at her house and invited us to join them too. So we spent the day and I got inspired to take some shots.

My little Bug is learning that you do what you need to in order to get a good shot!

Can it really be two years?

2010-04-11T08:40:00.000-07:00

Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like hell. ~Edna St Vincent Millay

Can I brag?

2010-03-19T13:43:00.000-07:00

Ah heck it's my blog, of course I can!
My boy received student of the month this month for his first/second grade class!
But wait there's more....
During this weeks parent teacher conference I learned that he tested at a third grade level in math!
But the very best part is that he tested at a fourth grade reading level!
He's in the first grade and reading chapter books.
I don't know about you but I only remember learning my alphabet and numbers in first grade.
Either I was in the special class and don't remember it or holy cow they teach kids a lot more these days. But don't you worry my head deflated when later that day he made a huge mess of his room and I noticed he used a stick to poke holes in the canopy on his play structure, completely destroying it. Kids, they seem to know how to balance things out.

Somethings got me a bit prickly

2010-03-12T18:41:00.001-08:00

So I thought I'd blog about it. It's been a few ... OK several months since I've set foot in this blog. The only thing that brought me back was a rampant fad that I've found going on over on Facebook.
I started bitching and complaining in my mind about it and then tada! Light bulb moment, this would really be a good blog post!
The fad isn't one that most people would think, it's not status shuffle or farmville.
It's people starting their own Photography business.
After about the fourth or fifth "Come be my photography business fan" request and the twelve thousandth time I've looked at other starting photographers Facebook sites. It dawned on me, a love of photography does not a good photographer make.
Sure some, actually a very small percentage, no make that maybe 1% of the ones that I've looked at lately are NOT GOOD. They do all the amateur photographer mistakes, over lightening in photoshop making the picture look grainy due to their inadequate skills using lighting. Heavy vignettes trying to make a so so picture look OK. It pains me so much to think that people are actually paying for these.
But then there is a flip side to all of this. Those friends of mine who really are totally awesome photographers. Those blogs that I frequent of amature master photographers. To these people starting a buisness makes them take pause. They have such great talent and yet they slowly and methodically take their time to start a business or they don't at all. They remain happy just doing this hobby and creating their art. True artists aren't in it for the money, they're in it for the love of it. Oh how I love these photographers.
In the mean time if you are in the market for a professional photographer, look at their work and compare it to others. Don't just hire anyone with a digital SLR and a willingness to take your money... please!

p.s. The photo above was taken during a cold snap. It's prickly ice on my bob wire fence.

Wordless Wednesday ~ Slither

2009-09-01T21:39:00.001-07:00

For more Wordless Wednesday click HERE

Tell me Thursday

2009-08-05T13:46:00.001-07:00

Yesterday for wordless Wednesday I showed some pictures of what little boys are made of.

We had a birthday party for my grandma this last weekend to celebrate her 80th. For her birthday she asked that we do some work in her back yard. While weeding her flower beds I found a snail and knew immediately that Bug would love to see it.

Grandma found a nice plastic container to put it in and we put in some water from her pond along with some rocks and leaves. Bug was so excited about it, as new people arrived for the party he was excited to show them his new pet.

When Bug wasn't looking my aunts boyfriend Jim slipped another snail into the plastic container. As more great grand kids showed up Bug ran to his container to show them. He slipped the lid off only to find not one but TWO snails. The look on his face was priceless. Shocked he looked at me "Mom, the snail had a baby!" We all chuckled and didn't say a word as he made his rounds showing everyone the baby snail that just showed up.

When we got home husband couldn't stand telling him a lie any longer and explained what really happened. Poor Bug got a shocked look on his face and said " But I told all those other kids that my snail had a baby!!" Then he said in the next breath " That Jim! I'm gonna get him the next time I see him!"

When I googled to find out what snails eat there was a little tip at the bottom of the page that said "If you have two snails, you will end up with baby snails"

Great, just what I wanted. :P

Wordless Wednesday ~ What little boys are made of

2009-08-04T20:20:00.001-07:00

For more Wordless Wednesday go HERE

It's a boy!

2009-07-20T13:41:00.000-07:00

There should have been no doubt that it was going to be a boy.

After all, anything birthed at my house ends up being a boy.

Miss Dolly is a wonderful mother. He is all ears and legs! Big, healthy and active.

I promised Bug that if it was a boy he could help name it.

Makes me want to just cuddle him! I'll try for better pictures once momma settles down.

Forgotten treasure

2009-06-17T19:04:00.000-07:00

In the far reaches of my hall closet, behind the vacuum cleaner and Christmas wrapping paper, a piece of my childhood sat. Covered in dust and missing several pieces it was long forgotten. That is until it's colorful coat caught Bugs eye. Though it was missing parts and stained Bug instantly fell in love with the old kite that my dad had given me when I was ten. At first he tried holding it above his head and leaping from the table.

But soon he learned that if he gave it just the right toss it would fly for a short distance and then fall to the ground.

It turned out to be the perfect way to spend a warm spring day.

Wordless Wednesday ~ Still waiting for baby

2009-06-16T21:52:00.000-07:00

For more wordless wednesday click HERE.

Sorry I've been missing

2009-05-19T10:19:00.000-07:00

I'm really shocked that I haven't written a post in a whole month.

Spring snuck up on me and I've just been relishing every minute of it.

Despite staring at her for over a month, checking her in sensitive areas and trying to just plain will her to have her baby, Dolly is on her own time line.

I'm still checking her every day for "signs" of impending birth.

So far she just keeps getting bigger.

In the mean time I've been mowing grass like crazy.

Planting vegetables in my garden.

Playing with Bug in his newly filled sand box.

And generally keeping my online time limited to visiting other peoples blogs and Facebook.

In the last month another interesting thing has happened.

A small bird has decided he is in love with his reflection in my tinted office window.

He comes every day to talk to himself, admire his lovely feathers and give offerings of bugs and feathers to the bird in the mirror.

Isn't he sweet? He cuddles up next to himself and chirps softly.

These aren't the best pictures but hey, it's hard to photograph through double pained tinted glass!

Hello Dolly!

2009-04-14T14:34:00.000-07:00

It's no secret that I have an affection for all animals. It's also widely known that I have a special affection for those of the equine variety.

While perusing the farm and garden section of Craigslist I came upon and advertisement for miniature donkeys. I have wanted one of these for a very long time. Our neighbors two places down the hill have a field full of them. Every year when the babies are born I swear I am going to ask them if they want to sell me one.... every year I don't do it. So when I responded to the add, imagine my surprise when the people selling them where none other than my neighbors!

They were full of information for me. Bug and I spent almost an hour hanging out with them and their donkeys. They wanted to sell me a Jack (boy) and Jenny (girl) package but the Jenny was pregnant and it didn't take a genius to realize three Donkeys and three full size goats where not going to fit in my tiny barn. The whole time I talked with them a sweet little Jenny leaned against me as I scratched her back. I fell in love but knew that Mini Donkeys really do so much better with a donkey friend. So when they told me they were 95% sure she was pregnant that meant she had an instant friend inside her right now. Plus I can't resist having a baby around in a couple months.

So here she is meeting the goats for the first time through the fence.

Charlie (black goat) is certain she is going to eat him! You should have seen how high he jumped when she walked up behind him!

I think that is what fat belly. If she isn't pregnant than she needs to be on a serious diet!

So, anyone out there know anything about pregnant donkeys? I've been reading online and now I'm a little scared at what I got myself into!

Dreams.. was it the deviled eggs or something else?

2009-04-13T09:56:00.000-07:00

Last night I had the most vivid dreams. Ones that make you wake up and it takes you a minute to figure out that it was only a dream. Was it all those eggs I ate during Easter dinner yesterday? Or is it something else?
The first dream that I had was a variation on dreams that I've had on and off for as long as I can remember. I get to a parking lot and my car has been stolen. In disbelief I look everywhere for it, thinking that I just forgot where I parked it. I feel panicked and I wake up and feel relief that it isn't true.
After I fell back to sleep I dreamt that my husband and I both woke up late for work. Like seriously late, four and a half hours late. We were both panicked. I woke up on time, husband was already at work. Once again I was relieved it was only a dream.
I was compelled to figure out if perhaps there was more to this than eating to many eggs.
So I looked up what the meaning of each dream was.
This is what it said about my car being stolen in my dream:
To dream that you car has been stolen, indicates that you are being stripped of your identity. This may relate to losing your job, a failed relationship, or some situation which has played a significant role in your identity and who you are as a person.

Hmmmmm......

It said this about waking up late for work:
To dream that you are late, denotes your fear of change and your ambivalence about seizing an opportunity. You may feel unready, unworthy, or unsupported in your current circumstances. Additionally, you may be overwhelmed or conflicted with decisions about your future. You feel time is running out and that you do not have time to accomplish all the things you want.

Kind of go together don't they. Makes me think it wasn't the eggs after all.

Wordless Wednesday ~ Under the Sea

2009-04-07T21:23:00.000-07:00

Find more wordless Wednesday HERE.

Odds and Ends... well mostly just odds.

2009-03-27T15:48:00.000-07:00

I really wanted to post a photo story Friday again this week. I'm really enjoying participating. I spent several hours trying to edit pictures from our trip to the Aquarium this past weekend. Do you know how hard it is to get a good shot in a dark aquarium without flash, moving fish in the background under filtered light and small child in the dark foreground looking at them??
Oh you do know? Well then you'll understand how many good pictures I ended up with. I'll post them sometime but I'm not done with the massive editing job just yet.
I'm having a hard time finding the inspiration to blog. Several semi funny things have happened in the last few weeks but I just can't seem to properly put them into words. Like the story of the gift I just received. It's really kind of funny but when I type it out it's just lacking something.
My mother in law brought me back a present from Arizona. It's a purse made from crochet plastic bags. I'll let you all digest that for a moment. Yes plastic bags from stores.
You can sort of tell which ones where from Walmart and which are from Safeway. I suppose it could be considered the ultimate in recycling but I'm just not feeling it. See, only slightly funny.
In other news, I've been super cranky this week. Yesterday husband came home and I told him I didn't feel good, that I had horrible cramps. Husbands response was "Oh that explains a lot"
Note to all men... that is NOT the correct response.
Since I was feeling so crappy I went to the store to buy a bottle of wine after work. I got up to the register and the guy asked for my ID. I hand it to him, he looked at the picture, looked at me and then as he was typing the date into the register he says really loud "OH Wow!"
I thought maybe I'd one a prize until he said "You don't look that old!"
Um... ok I think that was a compliment.

Photostory Friday ~ Marbeling

2009-03-18T21:00:00.000-07:00

Hosted by Cecily and MamaGeek

A few weeks ago Bug and I went to visit my dad. After loving on the brand new baby goats, mydad, Bug and I went over to watch my dad's friend Marjorie work.

She creates marbled fabric and sells it to other crafts people. They in turn make beautiful things from the fabric. The process of making this fabric is long and I won't go into specifics because, well I don't remember all of the technicalities!

What I do know is that is was fascinating to watch. Bug who has a short attention span watched for about two hours in a cold cramped studio as Marjorie worked her magic.

Bug was entranced....

Marjorie put row after row of dye onto the special slimy liquid.

Then she used a "comb" to smooth out the lines.

Then she used a "rake" in the opposite direction.

Once the pattern is the way she wants it she lays the fabric into the solution.

When the fabric is lifted the die is adhered to it.

She makes multiple patterns and stores every on in her head.

It's was so fun and very inspiring to watch an artist at work. It reminds me that I need to find my bliss!

Photo Story Friday ~ Uninspired

2009-03-12T17:00:00.000-07:00

Hosted by Cecily and MamaGeek

I have been feeling completely uninspired lately.

Uncreative, listless, and tired.

I don't know if it has been the weather or what.

I haven't even wanted to pick up my camera.

When I do I feel like every picture I take is crap.

Then a few days ago the baby lambs started arriving at our neighbors down the hill.

Every morning they when we drive by Bug and I ooooh and ah at their cuteness.

The weather was gorgeous today so I took some time on my lunch break and headed out with my camera. Of course the sun was out and at a harsh angle.

Every picture I took looked washed out. I couldn't get it right.

When I got to the lambs field there were all of two within shooting range. I had to peer over a bunch of dead blackberry vines to try and shoot them. The rest were far away taking their afternoon naps. There was none of the running and jumping in a huge pack that we see every morning.

I walked back up the hill to my house a bit let down.

I had finally gotten inspired by something and it didn't work out.... again.

Then as I walked toward my house I saw this image.

The mountain reflected in my office window.

That's when I decided that there shouldn't ever be a reason for me to feel uninspired when I have this reflection to look at every day.

Wordless Wednesday ~ A trip to grandpas farm

2009-02-24T19:59:00.001-08:00

Check out more Wordless Wednesday posts HERE.

Wordless Wednesday ~ Sunrise

2009-02-17T21:19:00.000-08:00

Check out more Wordless Wednesday HERE

Dear Blog,

2009-02-15T22:00:00.000-08:00

I'm sorry that I have been neglectful.
I've been preoccupied.
The attraction of someone else has pushed a wedge between us.
You see I don't have to "work" so hard for this other friend.
My creativity is not needed.
I don't feel the pressure from them like I do from you.
I know there is room in my life for you both but I just haven't been able to figure it all out yet.
If you could just bond with my new friend too, I know you would like them.
In fact if there was some way I could merge you both then it would be the perfect solution.
Until I figure it out... please stick by me.
I won't completely give up on this relationship.
But Facebook is just so new and exciting right now.
I'll see you in a few days... as soon as I read what all my friends are doing.
Love always,
Autumn

My PSA for the day

2009-02-09T08:47:00.000-08:00

I'm here so that others can learn from my mistakes, so here you go...

First, don't assume that your six year old is just being quiet in the kitchen.
Second, when six year old says "Oops I spilt a little milk" don't assume it is a "little".
Third, when you clean up the milk with kitchen towels do not arbitrarily throw those kitchen towels into the dirty clothes hamper in your bedroom.
Fourth, when your wiener dog suddenly has a strange fascination with said clothes hamper, do not ignore it.
Fifth, when you open your bedroom door and it smells rank, don't assume it was your husbands, child's or dogs gas.
Sixth, when you do your laundry three days later... hold your breath.

Your welcome.

Photoshop drop out...

2009-02-04T20:52:00.000-08:00

I mentioned last fall that I had signed up for a Photoshop elements class. I also mentioned that I was the youngest in the class by a good twenty years. I ended up dropping the class. In spite of feeling like a total dope when it came to PS elements I was ahead of most of the class. The pace was slow and I just felt that if I put a little more effort into it on my own I'd get the hang of things. I still have a love/hate relationship with it.

I love it when I take a picture and love it SOOC (Straight out of camera). I feel that I have really accomplished something. To me it takes such skill to take a wonderful picture out in the field using manual or semi manual setting. I push myself to sharpen those skills, it may be a lost art in the future.

I do believe in some degree that Photoshop is taking away from the skill and art of Photography. It's easier to just fix it on the back end because you don't have the pressure of the moment.

On the flip side I can really appreciate the skill that Photoshop takes. It's the modern day dark room. Ansel Adams did a lot of his work in the dark room. Using his skills with developing to make his pictures one in a million.

So I am trying to find a happy medium, to not try and fix every flaw in a picture or make it to processed, but just enhance a few things here and there. All while still trying to get the best SOOC shot that I can.

As I started editing pictures into black and whites I practiced with other editing processes. Here are a few of my before and afters. I'm sure or at least I hope, next year I'll look at these and say "Wow I really have come a long way since those!"

Here is a picture of my husband and I that my sister in law took.

It's a nice picture but the bird in the air and the cars in the background are very distracting. So when I turned it to black and white for my wall I did this to it.

This next picture is of Bug out in the yard. I love the genuine smile on his face in this shot.

The only issue is that dang huge blue ball behind him. Now I do kind of like it but when the picture was turned black and white is just looked weird. So I took it out.

I see so many things that I probably could have done better on that one but eh... it's just fine. Here is a shot that I scanned from an old picture of Bug and his big brother. I loved this shot because it shows just how good of a big brother he is. Helping his little annoying brother.

The only problem was the guy in the background with the stroller and the little girl behind my stepson. So very distracting..... so I removed them and this is the result.

So I'm trying, reluctantly to improve my skills with Photoshop elements. I won't go into how long it took to edit just these three pictures. Oh well life isn't a race right?

Rural life

2009-02-02T20:56:00.000-08:00

My friend from up the road called me this afternoon.
She asked me if I had seen Gus.
I told her I hadn't.
Gus is one of her horses.
He is a very, very old horse.
He had been declining in health very quickly.
She was so worried because he was in the yard at six this morning.
But by this afternoon there was no sign of Gus.
I could hear in her voice how worried she was.
I suggested that maybe he wondered into the woods to die.
She thought that was probably what happened but just prayed he wasn't laying somewhere suffering. I assured her that I would keep a close eye out for him.
Tonight as I drove home from picking up Bug at daycare I drove the back way hoping to catch a glimpse of Gus. An hour later my friend called to let me know that she had finally found him.
He did indeed walk into the woods ...........and right off of a cliff.
He walked off of the normal trail and straight into a rocky ravine.
Unfortunately he was still alive when she reached him.
Her husband had to put him out of his misery.
He left the other horses and went into the forest so that the predators who would eventually find him wouldn't hurt them.
I'm not sure why I felt a need to post this except to show what it's like here in the country.
Where natural beauty abounds and where horses commit suicide to save the herd.

Black and White

2009-01-28T17:24:00.000-08:00

I've been working on a project for the hallway in my house. I replaced the old light fixtures and put some fresh paint on the walls and ceiling. Then my plan was to edit several family photos and turn them into black and whites.

I used black spray paint on a bunch of frames I already had and put white mats in them. My idea was to put the frames up randomly and not in a pattern. Not an original idea, I've seen it done many times, but I love the look. My brain however doesn't work randomly. My brain likes to make patterns where everything lines up symmetrically. So to combat this I just started pounding in nails, grabbing a frame and putting it up. In the end I was pretty proud of my random creation. It looked really good to me.

Then this morning as I was walking down the hall I realized that even using what I thought were random movements I had created a pattern! Three rows that were not straight but rows none the less. Each row had the picture going the same direction, top row landscape, middle row portrait and bottom row landscape. I almost took them all down to put them in more random positions but I give up on random... random is over rated.

Random thoughts from an insomniac

2009-01-26T19:45:00.000-08:00

I woke up on the couch last night at 1 AM.
This is starting to become a bad habit. I kiss the husband and Bug goodnight.
Then I settle down to watch some t.v. and end up waking up on the couch after midnight. After I put on pajamas and brush my teeth, I lay in bed wide awake for an hour or more. Random thoughts clogging my mind and not allowing me to sleep. Last night they went a little like this:

~ Damn it, I need to fall asleep.
~ I wonder if I can actually go 20 minutes on the elliptical tomorrow without killing myself.
~ I'll probably collapse at 18.
~ I really need to see if I can fix the read out on the elliptical.
~ Then I can find out just how many miles it takes me to kill myself.
~ I can't believe I spent two whole days editing photos and I'm still not done with that damned project in the hall.
~ I should post some of those black and white pictures on my blog.
~ I wish I could blog more.
~ Damn it, I need to fall asleep.
~ Maybe I should stop posting and just read blogs.
~ No I enjoy it when I actually get around to doing it.
~ Damn it, I need to fall asleep.
~ Stupid power company and their stupid $400 bill.
~ January is a stupid month to settle up equal pay.
~ I wonder if mortgage rates will go back down.
~ Why the heck didn't I call about them the week before?
~ I'm an idiot and I really need to get to sleep.
~ Dang I wish he'd stop snoring it's keeping me awake.
~ Next week I'll make a meal plan for the week before I go grocery shopping.
~ God I hate cooking.
~ I love good food, why do I hate to cook?
~ It's my mothers fault, she hates to cook.
~ But I hate baking too and she loves to bake.
~ Good God I need to get to sleep!

And so on and so forth... my mind won't stop!
At least I eventually do fall asleep.
I wake up in the morning feeling less than well rested.
If I go to bed at the same time as husband and Bug I'd wake up at 4am... is that better?

I love faces

2009-01-19T08:34:00.000-08:00

Here is my entry for I love faces. This is one of my favorite pictures of Bug.

Thanks for stopping by, please check out the other contestants.

Someone seems to be missing something...

2009-01-14T18:07:00.001-08:00

For days Bug has had a wiggly front tooth. Husband and I have implored him to let us yank it out. He has flat out refused. His tooth was so loose that it would jut out and it took everything I had not to laugh. Monday night we were playing a glorious game of Spongebob squarepants game of Life. Bug was sitting on the floor, his knee in front of his face when he sneezed. His face bounced off of his knee and when he looked up there was no tooth! I must have looked shocked because he said "What?"
I said " Bug your tooth! Did you swallow it?"
Just as I said it I saw the tooth on the carpet and started laughing.
Bug looked a little shocked but started laughing too. Poor kid looked in the mirror and I thought he was going to tear up. He was definitely disappointed by his new appearance.
Then he asked "Mom why do we have to loose our teeth anyway?"
I said " Well you would look pretty silly when you get to be an adult and have teeny teeth in your mouth!"

He's over it now and used to the big gap.

Now the poor tooth fairy is broke.

She wasn't prepared and didn't have any one dollar bills on hand.

So Bug ended up with five bucks.

It seems like yesterday I was waiting for those baby teeth to come in.

Delurking day...

2009-01-12T08:16:00.000-08:00

There is a tradition in the blogging world of having a delurking day. I have never participated until this year. In fact I forgot all about it until I was over at Greeblemonkey where Aimee was participating. What does this mean for you?
All of you who read my blog but don't comment or comment all the time or just stumbled here unexpectedly, please leave a comment. Even if it just says "Hi".
Spread the comment love by commenting on other blogs that you read to let the authors know you are out there.
Thanks and Happy Monday all!!

The bad words ....

2009-01-10T08:19:00.000-08:00

This morning while I was making coffee Bug was recounting what happened at school yesterday.

Bug: Mom one of the big kids at school said the F word just because he lost a game.

Me: Oh no, that's not good.

Bug: Yea I couldn't believe it. So mom what's the F word?

Me: It's a word little kids shouldn't say. It's not a nice word.

Bug: Can you just tell me the word? I promise I won't say it.

Me: I don't know, I don't really feel comfortable saying it to you.

Bug: Well I know some bad words I just don't say them.

Me: Oh really? What bad words do you know?

Bug: Well there's stupid and dumb. I don't say those, well usually, and damn is sometimes a bad word.

Me: (Breathing a sigh of relief) Oh yes of course those are not nice things to say.

Bug: So what's the F word? Fart knocker?

Me: (Laughing) No, not fart knocker. That really isn't nice but it isn't a bad word.

Bug: (going through all the f words in his head) hmmm fly, flamingo, fry....

Me: I don't really think it's a word you know. (congratulating myself for censoring around him so well)

Bug: Can you just tell me please mom, I pinkie swear I'll never say it. Oh yea and there's another word you shouldn't say Oh my God. But you say it a lot.

Me: Ok I'll tell you if you promise not to ask me what it means or repeat it.

Bug: I promise mom, I'll even do the secret hand shake with you to prove it.

Me: (hoping she remembers what the heck the secret handshake was) Ok fine.

Insert a fist bump, high five followed by a hug.

Me: The word is Fuck.

Bug: (with a seriously perplexed look on his face) Fuck??

Me: You said you wouldn't say it!

Bug: huh, never heard it.

Me: (Wondering how on earth that is possible) Good!

I hope I remember this when he's a teenager so that I can remind him of his innocent days!

A mess in the garden

2009-01-07T20:41:00.000-08:00

There is a mess in my garden.
I've been ignoring it for weeks.
I'm so disgusted by the whole stupid thing.

Yes, that is my tiny green house in a heap.

Damn it!

When I secured it last year after a collapse I only secured the Southern and West ends.

We usually get all of our wind from that direction pushing things to the North East.

This year we got slammed with wind out of the North.

Damn it!

I was too lazy to take it down for the winter.

I'm an idiot.

So now I sit here wondering if I should even bother putting it back up.

At least this time it wasn't full of newly planted plants... that clean up truly sucked.

Metal

2009-01-05T18:53:00.000-08:00

My husband is a diagnosed car nut.

We are car poor... or rich... however you want to look at it.

This last Summer was spent most of our car time at the race track and not at car shows.

In fact I think he only took our show car to one show this last year.

We did however spend some time at a large show on the coast without our actual show car.

I don't share his passion for classic cars but I do respect and admire their artistry.

They also serve as a wonderful subject for photographs.

I'm trying to remember what Summer was like so I'm posting some of my favorite shots from that day.

Christmas... a review

2008-12-30T21:17:00.000-08:00

This Christmas wasn't anything spectacular.

But it wasn't a disappointment either.

How could it be? I have a healthy happy family.

It started with Christmas eve at my grandmas house.

Since the beginning of time, ok the beginning of my time, I have had Christmas eve at my grandmas house. It is a tiny little house. But it is filled with love and family.

My sister drove several hours to be here and celebrate with us and it's a good thing that she did.

My dad gave my nephew a present he could only dream of.

My nephew is one of those rare kids that can hear a tune and recreate it within minutes.

Not exactly a musical savant, he clearly has a talent.

Once the guitar landed in his hands it didn't leave for the rest of the evening.

My dad shares his enjoyment of music and played a few songs for us all on his own guitar.

The following day we spent at my brother and sister in laws.

They had already received their present in the form of an extremely over weight and loving yellow Lab named Abby.

It's a long story but they saved one boy and one dogs heart by taking her in.

What happened next was excruciatingly sweet.....

My husbands brother fell in love with one big fat Labrador and she in love with him.

It was a Christmas miracle.

Wishing for sunshine

2008-12-28T18:26:00.000-08:00

I know Christmas is barley over, but I can't help it.

We had snow and then rain. I just want to go for a walk!

I love those crisp cold winter days that are filled with sunshine.

We haven't gotten around to any of those yet.

So here are a few pictures from some summer days...

Enjoying some time off

2008-12-23T08:10:00.000-08:00

This past week has brought us a bit of snow.

Last Friday we had enough that Bug spent the whole day sledding down our hill from the shop to the house and back. It's amazing how much kids change from one year to the next. Last year he didn't get the idea of momentum at all. He tried to jump on the sled but never did get the technique right and it made for some very slow slides down the hill. Because of this he wasn't too excited to march back up the hill and try again.

This year was a completely different experience. He caught on quick that if be jumped on the sled and pushed off hard it made a fast and fun ride down the short hill. I'm sure he took that ride no less than 100 times Friday. On Saturday he was able to share his experience with a friend and it was so cute to watch Bug explain the technique to his friend who had never gone sledding before.

He wasn't too thrilled with mom bundling him up tight.

One dumb parenting moment

2008-12-17T14:58:00.000-08:00

Let me begin by saying there is a reason they don't name cows on large cattle ranches.

A very good reason.

A reason that hit me square in the face last night.

Bug was excitedly discussing how when he was big and owned a gun he would be a hunter.

He was going into great detail about how he would blow away anything in his sites.

You see, despite my child seeming ever so sensitive most of the time, he has this strange obsession with guns and hunting. This despite the fact that neither his dad or I hunt, nor has he ever been around a lot of hunting aside from knowing that my dad does hunt on occasion. I'm not against it, we just don't do it and we certainly don't talk about it.

I was getting annoyed that he seemed to have no understanding the impact of shooting an animal has. You know, that it actually dies.

I asked him in a curious but non accusing tone "So you could actually kill an Elk or a deer?"

Bug replied with hands holding an invisible gun "Yep, they'd get into my sites and I'd shoot 'em!" I was taken back by his brazen attitude and went on to say "So it doesn't really bother you that Papa had Fernando butchered last week."

Bug froze in his tracks, he stared at me with his mouth open. Then he squeaked out "You mean Fernando is dead?" Tears welled up into his eyes. Shit. Stupidest parenting moment ever.

I grabbed him up and hugged him. " Oh honey" I said " I didn't realized you would be so upset" He buried his head in my neck, I could feel the tears on my skin.

I tried to talk to him about it but he covered his ears with his hands and closed his eyes.

To be honest, he didn't act this upset when his grandma died in the spring. He was sad but not never did sob like he was now. All I can think of is that after losing her he has such a deeper understanding of what death means.

I told him I wouldn't talk about it until he was ready and that it was OK for him to be upset.

Later as I was making dinner he angrily said " I'm never eating meat again, not even chicken nuggets! I'm going to be a vegetarian."

I said that was just fine if that's what he wanted.

But then he said " I'm never talking to grandpa again!"

This shocked me, he loves his grandpa. The sun rises with grandpa when he is around.

I said " That would sure make grandpa sad"

Bug responded with " I don't care!"

I decided to just let it be and not get him any more upset. I figure in a few days he will forget that he was mad at grandpa for having the cow butchered.

I just feel like such an ass for underestimating my sons feelings.

We had discussed all along that the cow was for meat and would be butchered eventually. Never once before last night did Bug even bat an eye about it.

If I didn't know it before I'm now positive we won't be raising any cattle for meat at this house!

RIP Fernando

Home Sweet Home

2008-12-15T13:08:00.000-08:00

I arrived back home about one in the morning Saturday.

It was snowing as I started driving up our road and I had to put the Jeep in four wheel drive after I started slipping and sliding around a corner. Normally snow doesn't bother me but when it could possibly disrupt me getting back home after a week I was more than a tad annoyed.

My mom had planned to spend the day with me hanging out on Saturday but with an even colder storm heading our way and her long drive home over the mountains she opted to leave late Saturday morning instead.

Husband made a purchase while I was gone. Can you guess what it is?

We had been discussing getting him a better comuter car than the Jeep. He drives about sixty miles round trip to work. He ended up getting a really good deal on a deisel VW Beetle.

So now we have two Bugs in the family! I drove it around yesterday and loved it. Yesterday morning Bug looked outside and said " Look the Bug has a snow hat!"

It's Freakin cold here!!

2008-12-10T15:07:00.000-08:00

When I arrived in Ohio on Sunday night it had just snowed. It snowed Monday, Tuesday it warmed up and rained and now it's spitting ice balls at us. I hope the weather holds Friday for my trip home. I'm going to be so ready to get back.
Bug and Grandma are doing wonderful back home. Today Bug told my mom that he missed me but by the time I talked to him tonight he was laughing and happy.
Apparently when he went with grandma to feed the goats he climbed up onto the hay pile in the barn. He recounted the story like this: "Momma, I slid down the hay and you know what? I got hay down my underwear! Down my underwear momma!"
Me laughing " Was it itchy?"
Bug " Yes it was, so I had to take off my pants and underwear in front of grandma. IN FRONT OF Grandma!!!" Then he fell into a fit of laughing.
I think he's doing just fine.
Thank heaven for generous grandmas.

Leaving on a Jet plane...

2008-12-07T09:57:00.000-08:00

I'm off on another business trip today. This one will last the whole week and take me to Columbus Ohio. Bug crawled into my bed this morning and said " I wish you didn't have to go mommy". Way to break a mommy's heart.
My mom traveled 8 hours yesterday to stay and take care of Bug and husband while I'm gone. Bug will be getting a ton of one on one attention from Grandma and he's very excited about that.
Unfortunately I will be missing his Kindergarten winter concert. I just keep reminding myself how lucky I am to actually have a good job in this economy and then I'm OK with having to taking this trip.

Sunset at the beach

2008-11-30T18:24:00.000-08:00

I love the beach.

We don't have those sun bathing beaches here.

That's perfectly fine with me.

When we go to the beach we have to bundle up, even in September.

That was when we took our last trip to the coast and I took these shots.

I'm ready to go back.

Happy Thanksgiving

2008-11-26T16:20:00.001-08:00

Thanksgiving is near and dear to me.

Six years ago on Thanksgiving eve I was very pregnant.

I sat on our living room couch and complained to husband about how busy work had been that day. I was exhausted and didn't want to think about the next day.

We had promised more than one family that we would make an appearance the next day.

Husband joked and said "Could you just go into labor so we don't have to go anywhere?"

At 10pm contractions started coming hard and at 8:28am on Thanksgiving morning my little turkey made his entrance. My sister in law brought us up plates of food so we didn't have to eat the crappy hospital dinner.

I've never been so thankful than the Thanksgiving day my son was born.

So even though his birthday is Friday, tomorrow I'll tell him happy birthday and how thankful I am that he is here.

So did you get what you were looking for?

2008-11-23T07:01:00.000-08:00

I love Google Analytics, the last position I had with my company was very analytical. I totally love me some good stats. Yea, I'm a complete dork.
But what I love the most about Google analytics is that I get to see how people end up on my blog. Usually it's a lot of poor saps looking for something that has to do with Autumn the Season and not Autumn the person. But recently someone ended up here by searching for "Autumn is a pain in the ass" Yes I understand that I am sometimes, but why exactly do you need to google that? I'm sure that search ended up on my pain in the ass post, click it .. you know you want to read all about the time I got horned in the ass by a goat.
There are multiple searches for someone that I went to high school with. Someone I did not know very well and who's name I will not mention in this post. The only reason they end up here is the fact that my dear friend Corey left me a comment telling me how that person has a blog too. Thanks Corey, whoever ended up here spent a good five minutes perusing my pages. Hopefully they found your comment and so it all made sense to them then.
Actually I thought about deleting it but I need all the hits I can get... it boosts my self esteem.
Other than those I seem to have a lot of gardeners ending up here, I'm sorry to disappoint. This isn't HGTV and I'm not a botanist that can explain what an alstermaria looks like or what ate your pumpkin.

Man do I feel bad...

2008-11-21T11:40:00.000-08:00

I have been planning Bugs birthday party for a while. His first friends birthday party complete with invitations, pinata and goody bags. Then he got really sick so I held off sending out invitations until early this week. We were having it a week before his actual birthday because let's face it not many people want to take their kid to a birthday party the day after Thanksgiving. Yesterday husband found out he has Pneumonia!

We had to cancel the party. Bug is so bummed out.

When husband said " I'm so sorry son, I'm sorry I ruined your party"

Bug responded with "Oh it's not your fault daddy, it's the sicknesses fault"

My sweet compassionate boy.

So instead of a party Bug and I are going to a fun center place with his cousin.

I'm sure after a fun day devoted to him he'll forget about how much he wanted his first friends birthday party.

Did I mention that my baby turns six next week?

I'm in complete denial.

Trying something new

2008-11-19T14:57:00.000-08:00

I'm going to stop pressuring myself to post several pictures and a story sequence. I think it's inhibiting me from posting at all because it takes so much time.
So I'm taking a queue from one of my favorite photo bloggers, Monstergirlee and I'm going to try one shot at a time for a while. Maybe I'll get back into the groove!

I know this picture is over exposed but I love it. He was having so much fun playing in the leaves! Oh yea and I'm back to black.... sorry to those that can't read well on a black background I just think pictures pop so much better with it!

One shot

2008-11-12T16:30:00.000-08:00

A fall blooming begonia against my dads woodshed wall.

It's color was striking against the cool wall.

Bug is doing better but still on the mend. Now husband is sick... someone rescue me.

Riding the roller coaster

2008-11-10T14:28:00.000-08:00

Thank you to everyone who left comments on my last post.
Things are much better with Bug this week.
We got the test results back and they were all negative for Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis.
Thursday was hell, Friday was a bit better and Saturday he was like a normal kid.
He was stiff Saturday night but by Sunday morning he was fine.
Sunday night after doing school work at the kitchen table he complained about his legs.
He has been stiff all day today and not wanting to walk around.
The doctor is pretty sure it is a virus at this point but said he would confer with a Rheumatoligist just to be safe.
Bug has a pretty big cough going on now along with a lot of snot.
I'm cautiously optimistic that he is on the mend.
I swear this parenting thing is not for wussies.

Sick with worry

2008-11-06T15:55:00.000-08:00

We have had some serious issues come up this week.

Saturday Bug complained that his feet hurt.

I assumed it was from the long trick or treating walk.

Sunday night he didn't even want to walk his feet hurt so bad.

I gave him a bath thinking the hot water would help.

After his bath he cried that they hurt really bad.

As his dad and I watched his feet started to swell in front of our eyes.

We put him in the car and rushed him to the ER.

They took blood and urine samples.

Everything came back completely normal.

They told us to watch it and follow up with his regular doctor.

The next day I took him to his regular doctor.

He was stumped as well but also felt we should take a watch and see approach.

There was no rash and no fever.

So we waited and by Tuesday night Bug was feeling a lot better.

The swelling left his feet but he complained that his elbow hurt.

Wednesday morning he was feeling good so I sent him to school.

When I picked him up at daycare that night he complained that his ankle hurt.

Then this morning he started complaining his hand hurt.

It was puffy too.

Then he started complaining about his back, and then he couldn't walk.

His lower back swelled up.

I rushed him to the doctor again and he consulted with another pediatrician.

They feel that they need to rule out many things.

He has no fever, no rash.

Just the end of a cold and all of this swelling.

So they are testing him for Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis.

I'm kind of numb and in shock and very sad.

I want it to just go away like it came... suddenly.

My active happy boy is reduced to severe pain.

And I just don't know what to do....

Please let it be something that can be over come.

VOTE!!!!

2008-11-04T09:29:00.000-08:00

If you haven't already,
Please get out and vote today.
We need some Change in this country.

A beautiful moment

2008-10-30T09:07:00.000-07:00

We are lucky enough to be in the flight path of some magnificent birds.
Every year in October flocks of Sand hill cranes fly south right over our house.
The year I was pregnant with Bug I was huge in late October.
I was taking my daily ~~waddle~~ walk during my lunch hour when I heard the most amazing birds.
I looked up searching the sky for the noise.
In amazement I saw thousands of birds. They were swirling up up up.
They looked like a large black cloud that churned and swirled as they tried to catch a stream of air high in the sky. I stood there in awe, I had never ever seen anything like it.
An old man who was working in his yard was watching as well.
"Sand Hill cranes" he said "Aren't they amazing"
Indeed.
Soon they caught a draft and took off south in one big flock.
Every year I see them, though never again in those magnificent numbers.
A couple weeks ago, after feeding the goats, Bug and I started on an impromptu walk through our property. We had just gone over a bank and into some trees when I heard their distinctive sound. "The Sand Hill cranes!" I shrieked in excitement.
Then I started running up the hill away from the trees so that I could get a better look.
Bug yelled out "Wait for me momma!!"
Breathless we both stood at the top of the hill and watched as several formations flew overhead.
Bug whispered " They are the ones with red on their head right momma?"
He actually retained something from all those hours flipping through my bird books!
When they had all gone Bug turned to me and said "That was a beautiful moment wasn't it momma?"
Indeed.

My Blogversarie

2008-10-28T08:20:00.000-07:00

As of last Sunday this blog of mine is a year old.
Time flies when you're having fun.
I wasn't really sure what I wanted out of this blog when I first started.
All I knew was that it looked like fun!
I would read my incredibly talented friend Corey's blog and I would start thinking in blog post.
I would dream of incredibly insightful and meaningful things to say.
Then I would sit down at the computer and totally F it up!
I'm just not that great of a writer.
Then I would set out to take some awesome photos and make this a photography blog.
But I'm just a mediocre photographer who gets really lucky sometimes.
So instead I write about my life and my family and post some pictures to chronicle it all.
It seems to work for me, it is who I am, average.
This past year has brought me incredible joy watching Bug grow.
It also brought extreme sorrow as I watched my step-mom die.
There have been a lot of changes in my life since she left.
I have asked myself a lot of questions.
Am I living my life how I want to?
Why am I blogging?
Do I spend enough quality time with Bug?
Why the hell do people have to die?
I slowed down my blog posts and tried to focus on real life over the Summer.
I thought about just shutting down the blog.
But in the end I have decided to just give it what I can.
Thank you for sticking around with me.

Slugs and snails and puppy dog tails....

2008-10-24T08:19:00.000-07:00

Warning, this post may make absolutely no sense whatsoever. So if you get to the end and think "What the heck was she trying to say? Boy that was five minutes I'll never get back". Stop your whining because I warned you.
After reading many of the comments on my last post I realized I'm meant to be the mother of a son. It wasn't always that way. I didn't know that I was supposed to be the mother of a boy. I wanted a girl and I wanted one bad. When husband and I decided to have children we thought it would be as simple as stopping birth control. We decided early on that we would only have one. Husband already had a son from his first marriage and I was sure that one child together would complete our family. I knew I had one shot to have that little girl I dreamed about. I read about all the ways to ensure that you will have a baby girl. I used all of the tricks outlined in those silly books but after a full year of not getting pregnant I was pretty discouraged.
I went to my OBGYN and explained my fears that I wouldn't be able to get pregnant. She listened to my concerns and said in the most unsympathetic voice " Well we can set up some tests if that's really what you want"
I didn't know if I wanted poked and prodded. I didn't even know what I would do if the tests said I couldn't do it on my own. So I left her office dejected. After four more months I told husband I was done trying. I wasn't going to put any more emotional pressure on myself. Besides if I got pregnant that month I would have a baby in December and I really didn't want to have a baby close to Christmas.
Two weeks later I had a positive pregnancy test and a baby due on December 7th.
For fifteen weeks I talked to her in my belly, decided on a girls name and hoped and hoped that she wouldn't be a he. Then the morning of my ultrasound I sat at my desk and started to cry. I told myself this is it, I know I'm having a boy. I said to myself "You can cry this one time and then you aren't allowed to cry about it anymore" And I haven't. I have enjoyed Bugs boyness. I have however asked myself why several times.
As each and every one of my childhood friends had baby girls. I wondered why I wasn't meant to have one too. When I walked through the baby aisles and looked at all the pretty girl clothes I thought "Why can't I pick out dresses with flowers instead of t-shirts with bugs?"
But earlier this week when everyone was shocked that I would let my five year old eat a sucker with a bug in it, I realized I was meant to be the mother of a boy. I pick up snakes, bugs and crawdads for him to see. I'm not afraid to let him climb trees or get dirty.... or eat bugs.
He's a boy and I wouldn't trade him for a girl. I will probably still wish I could buy those pretty girly clothes. However to curb that desire I've been eyeing the cute dog clothes section lately... the dog will love me for it I'm sure.

Traveling Bug

2008-10-20T19:18:00.000-07:00

I'm back!
Ok so I've been back for almost a week, sue me.
Where did I go?
Houston Texas for a business meeting.

I make it a priority to bring Bug something special from my trips.

My days where filled with meetings and evenings with business dinners.
So I didn't have much time to do much shopping except at the Houston Airport.
I picked out a nice NASA t-shirt since he has been saying he wants to be an Astronaut.
While I stood at the counter I noticed some suckers in a box on the counter.
They had something in them....

Oh yes, that is a Scorpion.
Yes, it is real. Here are the ingredients just to prove it.

Ingredients: Malitol syrup, SCORPION, artificial flavoring and coloring.

I had to get it for my bug loving Bug. There was a day of show and tell where he thought up the following conversation.

Bug: I'll show K the sucker like this (holds sucker where you can't see the scorpion) and K will say " Oh cool a sucker". Then I will say " Oh contrare" and turn it around.

Then he announced that he was going to eat the sucker.

Husband didn't believe him and asked 100 times if it truly was edible.

But yes he ate it.

Here is the proof:

When asked what the scorpion tasted like, Bug replied " It tasted like sucker"

Only in Texas... or California where the sucker was actually made.

Life's a beach

2008-10-05T18:28:00.000-07:00

On a weekend in early September hubby and I made a last minute decision to take a trip to the coast alone. We met up with husbands brother and his wife who were camping at the beach sans kids. We did some antique store shopping, lunch and then we headed down to the jetty.

I was trying out my new lens, snapping some pictures of my sister in law.

Then some pictures of my her and my brother in law together.

And I took some pictures of the brothers together.

Then my sister in law ripped my camera out of my hand and insisted that she take hubby and my picture! OK not really. She nicely offered to take a couple pictures of us.

This next one is deceiving. It looks like we are lovingly looking at each other, but in actuality husband make some smart ass remark and I'm giving him a stink eye.

Then I set out to get my macro on....

As I was finding interesting patterns in the rocks, I noticed my crazy sister in law. She had taken off her shoes and running around in the freezing weather barefoot in search of sea shells.

When you look at a larger version of this next picture you can see the hairs on these berries.

Someone had a large dog that left wonderful prints in the sand.

Remnants of a pier was a fun subject as well.

After a short time on the freezing sand we made our way back to the campground.

We sat in their RV talking until husband and I realized we needed to start the long drive back home. As we made our way back to our car this was our reward at the end of the day.....

Any day I spend at the beach is a good day.

Score: Bookcase - 1, Bug - 0

2008-10-03T15:07:00.000-07:00

Bug's daycare called me this morning to tell me that a heavy bookcase had fallen over and landed on Bugs hand. They thought I should come take a look at it right away.
When I arrived he started crying and showed me his pinkie.
It was twice the size of his other one, with a huge blood blister.
So I took him to urgent care and the verdict is a broken pinkie finger.
Ouch!
He seems almost proud of it now though.
On the way home he said " I'm the youngest person in my family to have a broken bone"
With that "I'm pretty cool" tone to his voice.
God help me when this boy becomes a teenager!

The offending bookcase has been punished by getting screwed to the wall.

My frienemy

2008-10-01T09:48:00.000-07:00

I have a love/hate relationship with Photoshop elements.
I love what other people can do with it.
I hate that I suck at it.

So I did what I thought was the best thing to do.
I signed up for a Photoshop elements class at my local community college.
Then I found out I have a business trip and will miss the third class.
Undeterred I went to my first class last night only to find out that;

1. I am the youngest person in class by a good 25 years.
2. The syllabus lists the third class as having everything I want to learn.

Am I the only 30 something person that couldn't read a book or fiddle
with Photoshop and learn it really well???
Don't answer that, clearly I suck.
I'm hoping I get something out of it despite missing the best class.
Lucky for me I found out that they will be giving an advanced class next semester.
I suppose I'll have to pony up for that one too.

School update

2008-09-19T10:21:00.000-07:00

I really hate that Bugs school starts at 8:30am so I have to drop him off in the gym for breakfast.

He really hates it too.

He has stopped the crying but is continuing with the clinging.

He just wraps his arms around me and whispers "Not yet momma, stay a little bit longer"

So everyday I sit a little longer until he's comfortable.

Then I haul ass home so I can start work on time.

Bah!

If I could just drop him off in his classroom I know it wouldn't be like this.

Then Wednesday night he comes home with a note that says

"Reminder there is no Kindergarten on Friday"

Whaaaaat???

So far this month this is the third regular day they didn't have kindergarten.

Just when I thought I was cutting daycare cost in half, it's more like just a quarter savings and a hell of a lot more stress!

Trying something new

2008-09-18T14:55:00.001-07:00

IMG_3411 copy
Originally uploaded by autumnsbug

I'm trying something new by posting from flickr.
You see I received the most awesome birthday gift from my dad.
Can you tell what it is from this picture?
My dad spoiled me with a Canon 100mm f/2.8 Macro lens!
I have taken many pictures with it but this was one of my favorites. It's SOC and when I took it I fell in love with this lens.
I am having issues with getting the focus just right though.
Now I feel like I need to get a little more serious with this photography hobby.
I need to live up to my cameras potential.
Scary!

Ok I just looked and I don't like how Flickr posted it at all.... crap.

An equation

2008-09-09T11:06:00.000-07:00

Husbands cell phone goes swimming = New cell phone for me

Cool!!!!

Husband forgot to take his cell phone out of his pocket before jumping in our pool on Sunday. This time the phone didn't recover and neither did any of the 200 numbers he had stored in it.
Yes you read that correct, this is the second time the phone took a dip.
No he didn't learn to write his numbers down after the first time.
The first time it went into the washing machine.
Lucky for me, my line was up for a free upgrade.
Now we do the phone switch and he gets stuck with my old one.

My crappy morning

2008-09-08T08:44:00.000-07:00

For days I have explained the new school routine to Bug. Knowing that change in routine could cause a meltdown of disastrous proportions; I try to ease the pain by talking about it a lot.
This week we had to change the school routine by having Bug eat breakfast at school.
This means we leave the house earlier in order for me to get back home to start work on time.
We pulled into school a few minutes before they opened the doors.
As soon as I turned off the car Bug said " We have to go back home now"
I responded with "What? Why?"
Bug said " I have to poop, we have to go home."
I stammered " Are you sure? Can't you just go here at school?"
Bug shaking his head.. "Noooo mom I have to go home!"
Many options are racing through my head at this point.
Be firm and make him march in there and poop in the school bathroom.
Race home and be late to start work, but it would be OK because I would just work late tonight.
Then I thought, if I do that I am just giving in to him. He needs to get over this phobia!
Then I thought of my little boy, crying and holding in his poop because he refused to go. Only to have an accident later in the day... at school.
I turned the car back on and drove home.
10 miles round trip and we were back at school. Everything was OK until we reached his classroom. His teacher told us that every Monday the kids all start out in the gym.
As I walked him down to the gym he started to tear up. I tried to get his mind off of the sudden change, " Oh I don't know where the gym is, can you show me Bug?"
He took one look in the gym, with the chaos of kids yelling and playing. He grabbed onto me and burst into tears. He would not let me go.
I stood there trying to figure out what to do. Finally I peaked back into the gym and saw a friend of his that goes to his daycare. He was there with his mom.
Hallelujah!!!
We made our way over and when Bug saw his friend there he stopped crying. Still upset but not as bad, he gave me a hug, told me goodbye and let me go.
I got in my car and cried the whole way home.
God I hope tomorrow is better.

Mutton Bustin'

2008-09-04T11:44:00.000-07:00

You will get the reason for the title by the end of this post, I promise. One of our favorite late Summer activities is going to our state fair. Usually we end up going on the hottest day and get super cranky by mid afternoon. This year the weather was perfect, mid seventies, partly sunny. We arrived around 11am and stood in a long line to buy ride bracelets for my husband and Bug. I am not a ride person. I can't stomach whirling, twirling, bumping and jumping. But the husband and Bug love a thrill and were excited to start.

He insisted on doing the boring canoe ride too, dancing in the boat to the silly music that played in the background.

Then he spotted some blow up plastic guitars and NEEDED one. So he "won" one on a kiddy game.

After we worked up an appetite at the carnival portion, we made our way to lunch. Then on to the animal pens to see tiny horses, pigs, cows, sheep and goats. On our way out of the animal pens we grabbed some ice cream and heard a bunch of commotion. We sat down and watched as little kids rode sheep like buckin broncos. They asked if any other kids wanted to try. We asked Bug if he wanted to try. He said " Not yet, I'm eating my ice cream." He was calm about it, watching the other kids ride and fall. When he was done with his ice cream cone he proclaimed that he was ready. He got his helmet on. They asked him his name and where he was from, then they asked him to name his sheep. He christened him "Lightning".

They put him in the shoot and off he went! With a little help from two teens, one holding the sheep's head and one hanging on to the back of Bugs shirt.

He stayed on for a long time. Once he was off the crowd was cheering and he gave them a big wave. They presented him with a blue ribbon that proclaimed him "Mutton Bustin' Champion". He is so proud of that ribbon. Then we watched Chinese acrobats, walked through the garden and photography exhibits. By that time we were beat and started walking out.
Earlier in the day we talked about the "sky lift" that runs the length of the fair grounds. None of us had taken it before and we wanted to ride it some day.
It's just like a ski lift, you ride in little benches over the tents and people below. As we were almost walking out Bug said "Are we forgetting something?" and pointed to the sky lift. We couldn't not do it then and I'm glad we did. A birds eye view of the fair is a fun sight.

As the sun went down, we left the fair for another year.

The Kindergartener

2008-09-03T09:42:00.000-07:00

Bug started Kindergarten yesterday and he was so excited about it.

On the drive there we had this conversation.

Bug: Momma, I can't wave bye to you out the window at this school.

Me: Oh?

Bug: Yea, they don't have as many windows. But it will be OK Mom.

If anyone remembers, Bug has a set routine at daycare drop off. If he doesn't get to wave at me as I walk to my car, he has a melt down. I wasn't surprised that his little brain was already trying to figure out our new routine.

As I settled him in, I asked him if he was ready for me to leave. He nodded, gave me a hug and with a huge smile said "Bye mom, I love you."

I walked to my car, closed the door and started crying. I cried the whole way home.

When I picked him up from daycare he told me all about his new school. He was happy and excited to get to ride the big bus. I was so happy to see him and told him how proud I was of him. I must have been laying it on a little too thick because he then said to me "How long are you going to be happy for me?"

Your whole life my sweets, for your whole life.

Vacation fun

2008-09-01T18:44:00.001-07:00

I had the last week off of work and didn't find any time to blog. It was a fun filled week and I have many pictures to share.

It started with my birthday. I asked my dad if we could take his kayaks somewhere for the day. My dad suggested a high mountain lake that doesn't allow motorized boats. We had a small hike into it and it was worth the walk.

The weather was gorgeous and the water was crystal clear.

My dad wanted to show us the other side of the lake, where the water turns a Caribbean blue green and there are two small islands. Bug wanted to ride with Papa so I got to take his dog Hannah with me. She was not the ideal passenger!

When we returned it was time to practice some fishing.

We didn't get a single bite, despite fish jumping just feet off shore. After giving up on fishing, Bug and grandpa played some hide and seek.

Then we had to rescue Hannah from a would be dog napper... seriously what is wrong with people?

The huckleberries where in full swing so Bug loaded up with as many as he could eat.

Then Bug asked for one last row before the trip back home.

I couldn't have asked for a better birthday.

A day by the river

2008-08-19T09:58:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago we went RVing with some friends and family. With gas prices the way they are, we didn't want to drive far. Luckily we live close to some beautiful places. We spent one afternoon next to the river. Bug and his cousin practiced their casting.

Bug got his stuck on a rock in the river.

Oh daddy! Daddy save the line please!

But by the time dad got it unstuck, Bug was busy doing other things and didn't feel like casting any more.

Any day by the river, casting, throwing, swimming and playing, is a good day.

Adventures in gardening ~ Part 2

2008-08-13T16:15:00.000-07:00

It finally occurred to me that I haven't been blogging about gardening. It seems silly, since it is on the top of my hobby list. I put more energy into planting a garden this year than any year before. Perhaps the reason I don't talk about it is that most of my garden has been eaten, by rabbits and deer.

I don't have a fence around my garden so I have tried many natural deterrents. Automated sprinklers to scare them, some super stinky concoctions that are guaranteed to work and not be toxic. They didn't work.

So my only option was to build cages around everything I possibly could.

Here are my caged Zucchini and Pumpkin plants.

Without the cage, these plants would look like their uncaged neighbors.

Pitiful site isn't it. They could also end up looking like the uncaged lettuce.

They attacked the tomatoes too, so they also got caged in.

Unfortunately, I didn't get the beans caged well enough, something got in and at them to the point they wouldn't grow back. There are a few things they don't eat, like the corn.

And they don't touch the sunflowers. At least not this batch, they pulled the first ones out of the ground.

The flowers in my yard are not exempt from the midnight grazing either. My rose bushes sport long poky stems with no leaves let alone any flowers. There are however some lovely flowers in bloom that they don't find tasty. Like these lovely orange marigolds, even the bugs don't like to eat these.

Or this very invasive butterfly bush, nope no nibbles on it's leaves. No butterflies either.

Or this purple petunia.

Pretty purple fuzzy grass.

Pretty pink Penstamin that once bloomed in February, what a lovely surprise.

Bachelor buttons that come back every year wherever they feel like it.

The annual perennial purple daisy.

Pink Zinnias, one of six that didn't get eaten by bugs this spring.

Pretty purple cosmos, the package said it was multiple colors but only purple came up!

Pink ivy geraniums that almost died from over watering.

Purple verbena that replaced the other purple verbena I killed earlier this year.

And last but not least, red gladiolas. Some of the few that survived the move here six years ago.

I can show my Alstermaria, the rabbits clip that back to nothing. Or my Asian Lilly, the deer ate all of the buds off of that. I have twice as many eaten flowers as I do not eaten. I guess I need to go through the yard and plant only those the animals don't like to eat. Or get a really big outside dog or just maybe someone will build me a fence.

A day on Safari... sort of

2008-08-11T14:54:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago Bug and I drove down to my dads house and the three of us went to a wild animal park. It isn't like a zoo where all the animals are locked in small cages. It's hundreds of acres where the animals roam free. The lions, cheetahs and bears are separated from the zebra and giraffe of course! You drive your car along a gravel road and can stop and look at the animals from a distance. Occasionally you get a close encounter from an Emu wanting a closer look.

I hadn't been in years, but this was Bugs second trip with grandpa. A couple years ago while he was staying with Grandma and Grandpa they watched the movie Madagascar and decided to take Bug to the animal park the next day.

On that trip the Rhino's were a little too close for Bugs comfort. Unfortunately on this trip they were sleeping in the shade a long way from our vehicle so I couldn't get a good shot.

There were however many other animals to look at and take pictures of. First up, the lions, they were behind a fence this time, when I was younger there was no fence, just a guard telling you to keep your windows rolled up!

The Bears put on a "show". It was awesome to watch them play in the water.

I didn't get a nice close picture of the Giraffe, there was a young one eating on tree branches.

We almost missed these little guys as we drove past. They were perfectly still as they sunned themselves on logs.

The Elk and deer were resting in the shade.

My picture doesn't do this pretty guy justice. He was really gorgeous.

Unfortunately the Cheetahs were not in good photography range. The Hippos were under water, but we did get to see their heads for just a minute as they popped up to take a breath. It was interesting how many people didn't have patients to wait and watch the animals. They would drive around us, hurrying to the next animal. In doing so they missed some pretty cool sights.

When we were done with the driving tour we stopped at the "village". They have some Flamingos there, Bug was in awe of their color and the way they with their heads hidden on their backs.

They have a Koi pond with Monkeys on an Island in the middle. Bug was able to feed the fish and some pushy geese.

They also have an area where they show off the elephants. As we fed the fish, we heard the elephants coming and were lucky enough to have them walk right past us.

Three of them walked trunk to tail. They were so impressive. There is something about their eyes..... with all of those wrinkles.

It was a really fun day, we stopped for bagel sandwiches on the way home and then Grandpa filled our Jeep with plants.

A conversation with Bug

2008-08-02T07:43:00.000-07:00

This morning as Bug and I cuddled on the couch watching the weather man tell us what was in store for us this week, we had the following exchange.

Bug: Momma is this Summer?

Me: Yes

Bug: So when Summer is done will it be Winter?

Me: No, Fall comes after Summer.

Bug: Oh yea, cause that's when the leaves FALL from the trees.

Me: Yep, that's why they call it Fall.

Bug: Then why do they call it Autumn too?

Me: You know, I'm not sure. I've never really thought about it. (go figure)

Bug: I know why, they named it after you. The most beautifulist mom in the world.

Man I love this kid.

Little Lightning Party

2008-07-30T14:12:00.000-07:00

Bugs cousin turned six this month.
I was trying to come up with a cute nickname to refer to him by.

He loves the Disney movie Cars so I am going to refer to him as Little Lightning, in honor of the main character Lightning McQueen.

The theme for the party was of course "Cars".

I haven't mentioned this before, but Bug is obsessed with wanting a Mohawk.

So for the party I gave him a Fohawk.

He loved it.

He thought he was the coolest.

I think he looks pretty cute.

There was water sliding, bubble blowing and trampoline jumping.

Along with the fun pinata pummel.

I only wish I had gotten a picture of the snake that showed up under the pinata.

That created lots of screeching, running and near crying from the adults.

Just kidding, well kind of, my mother in law hates snakes and was sooo happy that she was on the deck and not in the grass when he slithered through.

A fun time was had by all, I'm so jealous that Bug doesn't have a Summer Birthday.

I can't bring myself to cram that many kids into my house during the Winter!

Sorry I've been MIA

2008-07-29T16:13:00.000-07:00

I am having a hard time living and blogging about it.
We had a long weekend last weekend and went "camping".
It was fun, but it's funny to call it camping when we drive up to a place in our RV and there are a hundred times more people around us than when we are at home.
I guess I should refer to it as RVing instead.
My dad did something a bit more exciting this weekend, he took a paragliding lesson.
How awesome is that? My dad, knocking on 60 and running down a sand dune with a parachute.
He also started taking electric guitar lessons, Bug is so impressed and a bit jealous.
My stepson is visiting from across the country.
He will be here two more weeks and so far has had a good time.
It's different having a teenager in the house.
As far as teenagers go, he is a really good kid.
I can actually sit and have a reasonable conversation with him about life.
It makes me just slightly less afraid of Bug becoming one.
So all of this makes for a busy time at my house. I'm going to try to edit some of the hundreds of photos I have taken the past couple of weeks.
No promises though, I might be posting Summer pictures in December.

Parade

2008-07-21T12:28:00.000-07:00

I haven't been motivated to blog latley. I think it has to do with the weather. I have so many other things to do when the weather is so nice. I'll get back to it better when the weather turns cold again. Hopefully that will be a while.

Last week our little town had their annual Summer parade. The week is filled with rodeo, lumber jack competitions, fireworks and the parade.

Every year Bugs preschool/daycare center has a float and every year I ask him if he wants to ride the float or sit and watch the parade. Every year he decides to sit and watch instead of riding.

A couple weeks ago, while I was picking him up from daycare, he pointed to the float they were working on and said " Mom, that's the float I'm going to ride on in the parade"

So that's what he did. The theme of the parade this year was "Green and growing".

So there were lots of flowers, the kids wore green shirts and white hats so they looked like flowers. Except Bugs best friend, he didn't want his spiky hairdo messed up.

Notice Bug with looking bored, they were waiting in line for the parade to start. I was worried that he wasn't going to like it.

Husband and I went down to main street to find a good place to watch the parade.

Here he is as they passed by us... see him, the one in the middle, the only one waving.

Nope, he's not having any fun at all.

Vacation Part 3 ~ Horses and houses

2008-07-15T14:19:00.000-07:00

Yes, I really know how to drag out a topic. This is my third and final post about our trip to my moms house. My mom has had horses for many years.

From the moment we arrived, Bug was completely enamored with the three horses and one spotted mule in the field. He wanted to be in there, with them, touching them. That is, he wanted that, as long as mommy was holding him or at least his hand!

They can be pretty intimidating to a small child. Especially Junior, who's back is almost as tall as I am and whose big head dwarfs ours in comparison. The weather was touchy the first couple of days we were there, so we didn't get to ride. Finally the weather warmed up and mom saddled up Junior so Bug could ride him around.

I was worried that he would be scared, two years ago he didn't last long riding with me in the field.

This time was totally different. Bug loved it and would still be up there today if I let him. At first we led him around by himself.

Then I got up and we rode around, but Bug insisted that he could ride by himself. So I got off and led him around, later he told his dad "I rode all by myself"

The property that my mom lives on is gorgeous, there are beautiful flowers, running water, and huge grassy fields. The house however, leaves something to be desired. It's very old and the plan has always been to build a new house on the property.

It's been a long arduous process of getting the correct permits.

But you can now see some progress on the new house.

With a big front porch that has views of the mountains. There will be huge picture windows and vaulted ceilings, but there is still a long ways to go. In the meantime some robins took up residence on the new porch. Can you see the baby birds poking out of the nest?

I wish I had gotten a picture of my old cat while I was there. He was pretty senile but was very loving and Bug doted on him while we were there. We figure he was about 16 or 17 and he died this last week. It was nice to see him one last time.

So that ends our trip to grandmas house, a nice time was had by all.

Broken

2008-07-07T12:42:00.000-07:00

I hope everyone had a nice long 4th of July weekend. Mine started with a bit of excitement. Months ago my husband entered a big car race. The people who put on the show Pinks were coming to a race track near us and my husband couldn't resist entering for a chance to win ten thousand dollars. They were doing something different, called Arm drop racing. He was really excited but I was feeling a bit of dread about the whole thing. I hadn't been dreading it up until this last week, I couldn't pin point why I felt this way, I just did. So Thursday evening we had the motor home with the race car behind and headed out. As we headed down the hill into town the motor home died suddenly. Not good when you are towing a car and have no power breaks or steering going down hill.
Luckily husband got it to a stop and we sat trying to get it started again. He called someone and they came down to take a look. There was a switch under the dash that was not getting power to it and so they hot wired around the switch and got it started. We went on our way, realizing we would have to deal with it on Monday. As we entered the freeway it started to sputter and died again. Husband tried changing the wires around which created a burnt wire and smoke billowing out from under the dash. Great, here we are, my husband, me, Bug and our two dogs in the RV on a busy holiday weekend. Stranded along a very active interstate. Bug didn't understand why I wouldn't let him out of his car seat. I was so afraid someone could run into us and he would fly through the windshield. Husband went under the motor home as semi's rushed passed. Realizing we weren't going to get it started again. Husband unhooked the car and trailer and called his brother who was already at the track and our friend who is part owner of the race car. His brother came down from the track and the friend came from our town. I smashed all of our things into garbage bags and pillow cases. We only had one cooler so I tried to fit all of the perishables into it from the fridge. We called a repair place and they said we could leave it there over the weekend but they would be closing the gates at 8pm and we had to get it there before then. It was 7:30 when is brother showed up, hooked onto the motor home with his truck and towed it to the next exit and the repair place. In the meantime the friend hooked up to the race car and met us at the repair place. Then they had to switch the trucks and car trailer.
As I was getting Bugs car seat into the truck a bee stung Bug on the finger.
Husband and brother in law went to the track and our friends took me, Bug, our food, clothes and dogs back home. Bug and I went up to the track Friday morning and watched husband race, it turned out to be a fun weekend. Unfortunately husband didn't win the ten grand but the car ran well and he did a good job driving. We still don't know the cost of our weekend, but we got our stimulation (yes I know its called stimulus) check just in time to stimulate the tow company and the RV repair place. Don't forget the oil companies, they got a lot of stimulation out of us too. Sigh.

Tucker ~ The crazy dog

2008-07-01T16:19:00.000-07:00

Tucker is one of my moms dogs. He's either a Kelpie or a red healer mix.

Her partner Mark picked him up from a local shelter last year.

They estimated his age at the time to be around nine months old. He was scared but seemed happy when Mark put him in his truck. As soon as they pulled into the driveway Tucker jumped out of the pickup window and ran into the fields near their house.

They called him, they tried to bribe him, but nothing worked.

He lurked in the tall grass, hiding but never coming very close.

Mom would leave food out on the porch and he would sneak onto the porch in the middle of the night to eat, then retreat to the field during the day.

After months of work, he will now go for walks with my mom. Let her pet him and put his leash on. But he still will not come into the house when Mark is there, and once drug Marks pillow out into the yard! He's like a wild animal, only letting my mom touch him and barking at everyone else who looks him in the eye. Right after we arrived Bug was playing with Tucker, Bug would run and Tuck would chase and bark. He wasn't being mean, just barking. We were all outside, mom and I walking around one side of the house and Tucker and Bug on the other. All of a sudden Tuck came up from behind me, nudging my hand with his nose a couple times. I looked down and then I heard Bug crying from the other side of the house. I ran around to see what was wrong, he was cowering behind my mom's bicycle crying. It seems Tucker scared him when he started barking a little to loudly. The dog didn't touch me or let me touch him again while I was there. He had only touched my hand to tell me something was wrong with Bug. After a day Bug got the courage to tell him "No Tucker, No bark" and as soon as he did Tuck would back off and go the other way. This poor dog, someone really treated him badly. He is so smart, but so messed up.

He would get so excited on our walks, trying to play with the other dogs but just blasting them over. My mom would have to scold him.

He is a pain in the butt, but what is she to do? No one else would have this poor crazy dog, she's afraid they would put him to sleep. She has a lot of work ahead to help this one, undoing what some jackass did.

Vacation Part 2 - The Wild West

2008-06-30T12:06:00.000-07:00

Welcome to the wild west.

Where the cows outnumber the people 100 to 1.

Everywhere you look are cows.

Big cows and little cows. Black, brown and polkadot cows.

But this little guy was my favorite, all alone, poor little guy doesn't know what he's in for.

It's too sad to even think about it. Makes me not want to eat burgers. But then I remember steak, yummmmm how I love a good steak. Sorry little guy.

Grandma Rosie loves going for long walks in the evening. Not sure how Bug would be able to keep up I said we would go with her until he got too tired.

I love that picture with his feet off the ground, he was so excited and happy.

That first walk, he made it almost the whole way, up steep hills, over brush and across irrigation ditches. The next day we tried it again and he made it the whole distance that time.

We followed a gravel road up a steep hill and then a path along an irrigation ditch.

From up on the hill you can see for miles into the valley below.

The weather looked menacing at times but it only sprinkled on us a little. In between rain clouds the sun would come out and it would get so hot we would strip off our sweatshirts and jackets, only having to put them back on again when the next cloud came overhead.

Bug persuaded me and grandma to play follow the leader. He would yell and we would yell. He would skip and we would skip.

Always turning to check and make sure we were playing along.

He also had fun throwing sticks in the irrigation ditches. We played a game at grandma's, putting a stick in the water on one side of the culvert and racing it across the road to watch it come out the other side.

Despite being surrounded by hills that seem dry and barren except for sage brush. There is a lot of water in the valley. Marshes teeming with wildlife, dozens of birds singing in unison.

Do you think I could actually get a good bird picture? Nope, not one good one. They were all around me, I could hear them. But when I went to get their picture they disappeared into the grasses and brush.

Finally!

2008-06-27T14:52:00.001-07:00

When we moved in five years ago, we knew we would need to put on a new roof soon.
You can't tell in this picture but the shingles were getting brittle and it looked very tired.

Then the last two winters have brought storms that ended with shingles in the yard. It needed to be fixed this year! So this last week a crew has been causing a racket above me.

But the wait was so worth it. The pictures don't do the new roof justice.

It makes my boring house look so much better!

To Grandma's house we go.... Part one

2008-06-25T10:49:00.000-07:00

A couple of weeks ago my two dogs, Bug and I took a trip to see my mom. She turned sixty this month and we hadn't gone to visit her in two years so I felt compelled to make the long trip. It's an eight hour drive to get there. Sometimes longer when you are traveling with two of these:

And one of these:

We live in the same state but at opposite ends of it. Our landscapes are quite different and we saw so much as we wound our way over three separate mountain passes to get to grandma's. Snow in the mountains and hot sun in the high desert. We passed through forests, crossed wild rivers, wound through deep crevasses that rushing waters cut into the mountains trying to make their way to the ocean. I seem to remember some of those things, but what I remember the most is... Dog breath.

And a whining child demanding that a new movie be put into the DVD player every hour and a half. When we finally crested the hill and could see the beautiful valley that is home to grandma Rosie we all cried out "Hooray" in excitement, or possibly exhaustion and exasperation.

My mom and her partner own eighty acres in a beautiful little valley that is surrounded by mountains on one side and rolling hills on the other.

The mountains have forests and the hills have sage brush and wild flowers.

It's so pretty in the spring and early summer, if only the winter wasn't hellish with snow for months and months at a time.

It's those hellish winter months that make my mom want to run far, far away from this place. That and the fifty mile drive to go grocery shopping in a town that doesn't even have a Target. It's at least two or more hours to Target, I'm really not sure how she survives.

We had a lovely time, in spite of the colder than normal temperatures.
On the first full day there she took us to the river that separates our state from the next.

The gravel road that runs along our states side has a very old and small tunnel that you have to go through in order to get to the best picnic spots.

After we found a good spot and got out, we quickly realized it was too windy and too cold to hang out for very long.

Bug wanted to stay and pretend fish with a big stick he found on the shore.

But we left pretty quickly after getting some pictures and rounding up four unruly dogs and a five year old.

If only it had been warmer, on our last visit we were able to go swimming in this river.

On the second full day we took a trip to the big town. My mom has been taking some college courses at the local community college and had to take her final. While we waited for her to finish, I took Bug to a local park. Just as we were getting ready to leave we spotted two squirrels by our car. Bug got out the rest of his morning muffin and threw them a piece as I took pictures.

One of them ran away while the other picked up as much muffin as he could. Then he ran it up a tree to share with the other one!

Stay tuned for part two when we walk the irrigation ditches.

Eleven years ago tomorrow

2008-06-20T11:35:00.000-07:00

On a rainy June day, my husband and I were married.

I woke up that morning to the sound of rain, pouring rain.

I planned an outdoor wedding, with no tent, at 2 o'clock.

Husband sent me a rose with a note "I don't care if it snows, it's our day and I love you."

After I got my dress on, at 1:50pm, it started to hail.

And then, at two minutes to two, the clouds parted and the sun came out.

Steam rose off of the chairs and everyone hurried to dry them off.

When the reception was done the rain came down again.

Happy anniversary my dear, through the storms, we're still here.

For a successful marriage you must learn to give and take, forgiveness is key.

And I forgive you my dearest, for making me spend my anniversary at the races.

Shameless brag

2008-06-18T11:52:00.000-07:00

While I was on vacation I had a huge jump in readers.
So of course I look at my trusty Google analytics to see that I received 109 hits from The Pioneer Woman.
I normally don't frequent hugely popular blogs but I just love hers.
I have this little obsession with entering all of her contests because they are freaking fabulous.
So I entered this photo naming contest.
No I didn't win... damn it!
But I did get an honorable mention as one of her favorites.
Wahoo!

Vacation hangover

2008-06-17T08:41:00.000-07:00

I've been avoiding blogging.

I've been avoiding the four hundred plus pictures in my camera.

The thought of trying to edit them into a manageable amount to post

on this blog is just too overwhelming to me.

Vacation started with a birthday party for my dad.

His first birthday since my stepmom passed away.

He is working on a memorial garden for her, raised beds made of stone.

Every day gets easier, but there was one very emotional thing that still needed to be done.

Her ashes needed to be spread.

Dad decided that he wanted to do it during his birthday party, most of her family and friends would be there to participate.

My dad found a spice rack, with no spices, just twelve empty glass containers.

He filled them with her ashes and let anyone who wanted to take a container

spread her ashes where they remember her.

As all the containers where handed out, we scattered to separate parts of the property.

I knelt down to Bug and explained what we were doing.

That we were sending grandma's body back to the earth and nature.

As we walked along he would stop and sprinkle little amounts onto the ground.

In the orchard where she planted the trees and picked their fruit.

Near the home that she built with my dad.

Near the pond that she helped Bug throw rocks into and look for frogs.

About the third sprinkle he started to say "Sprite light and back to life" as he spread her ashes.

He repeated it over and over as we walked along to the places that reminded us of her.

Later I asked him why he said what he did.

He told me " Because we were returning grandma back to nature to become the plants and trees, back to life"

I am forever amazed by this child of mine.

Friday Funny

2008-06-06T09:14:00.000-07:00

This is my last day before going on vacation. It can't end soon enough!

Cruisin'

2008-06-04T18:36:00.000-07:00

I think I've mentioned before that my husband is a bit of a car nut.

Ok, he's an all around nut, but he's more of a car nut than anything else.

Last Saturday we went to the first car cruise of the season.

For those of you that aren't familiar with car cruisin' here is the low down.

For this particular cruise, the town shuts down the main street.

You have to pay and you have to have a car older than 1972.

People line the side walks in lawn chairs and hoot and holler for their favorite car.

Since we have such a car and husband is a nut... we participate.

Here is our 1970 Olds 442, husband has owned it since 1987.

Yes he is old.

Many of our friends and husbands family also participate.

Here is the nut himself.

(I can call him a nut since he is in the shop working on an engine as I type this!)

This is my beautiful friend Jennifer and her baby boy.

We almost lost her last year in a horrible accident.

To see her here is so awesome... I just don't have words.

The kids suckered the dad's into getting them ice cream...

This on top of all the candy that was thrown out. Men.

Everyone had a good time. Nothing broke and we had lots of laughs.

Maybe next year it won't be so cold. I'm ready for Summer!!!

Sweet!

2008-06-03T14:47:00.000-07:00

I mentioned to my dad the other day that the meadow foam on the neighboring farm is currently in full bloom.

Just a few days earlier I watched as they unloaded several Bee hives at the top of the hill.

For several years my dad has done some Bee keeping of his own. We profit from his hobby with free raw honey every year.

I asked him if he would like to bring some of his Bee's up for the year. He happened to have two hives that needed to be moved, so he loaded them up and brought them to our house.

Good thing he wears a Bee keepers suite because those honey Bee's were MAD.

I stood back and zoomed in as far as I could.

My dogs wanted to see what was going on and didn't listen when I called them.

Poor Rocket, our dachshund, the Bee's went right for him.

Apparently they attack black, because bears and skunks often break into the hives and they are dark colored. He leaped into my arms and buried his head. Poor little weenie dog.

While putting the hive together my dad realized that he didn't put screens in one section.

This meant the Bee's made a big mess of honey comb with no good way to get the honey out.

Instead of wasting it all, dad scraped it out and put it into a big bowl for us.

For the last week we have enjoyed the sweet treat of honey.

Bug lit up to see a huge bowl of it. For the past week we have spent time chewing on small pieces of honeycomb and spitting out the wax.

Young love

2008-05-29T08:00:00.000-07:00

All year I've heard stories about Bugs "girlfriend".

Really?.... already?

I've kind of shined it on.

I'm a mommy in denial.

When the teachers told me that he was telling this girl that

she was beautiful during class.

I laughed it off .
When I heard they were holding hands.

I figured she would have cooties the next week.

When I learned that she cried the week Bug was out sick.

I thought she had a problem.

When they put her next to Bug in the graduation show so she would actually

walk onto the stage.

I thought she must be terribly shy.

Last week when I attended the end of year field trip

she was there with her mom.
Her mom came right up to me and introduced herself.

She told me "I've heard lots and lots about Bug."

I thought her mom was a bit obsessed.

My boy was not in love with this little girl.

Then as the two of them stood in line for the little Ferris wheel,

I heard Bug say to the operator,

"Can two people sit in a car? Because A and I want to sit in that red one together"

Then I watched as he helped her into her seat and put her seat belt on.

I finally had to admit it.... my boy is smitten.

Now who's going to break it to them that they will be in different schools next year?

Hot housing market

2008-05-28T12:02:00.000-07:00

Despite the dwindling housing market in the rest of the nation. There is a high demand for housing right outside my office window.

Over the last week I have been watching the flurry of perspective home owners fighting over the most desirable building in the neighborhood.

They've been poking their heads in for a look

Taking in the view from the front porch.

They try out the upscale landing pad.

Occasionally there is more than one family looking at a time.

They are holding nothing back and are quite loud as they try to compete

for this prime location.

They have heated discussions on how much it's really worth.

In the end, their dream of home ownership has been fulfilled.

Pink eye hell...

2008-05-23T12:10:00.000-07:00

My dearest boy,
Please keep your hands to yourself at daycare from now on.
Otherwise I will be forced to send you there in a Hazmat suit.
I know I said you should share, but I was really referring to toys and not germs.
Screaming, crying and flailing does not help me get the eye drops in your eyes.
No I will not buy you a red Mustang with white stripes if you cooperate.
Yes that was a bad word mommy said earlier while you were flailing and screaming.
Please do not repeat it at daycare next week.
Thank you,
Your loving mother.

So Bizarre!

2008-05-22T14:55:00.000-07:00

Last week when my dad came to visit he brought a tomato with him.

Not just any tomato... a tomato that decided it wasn't going to be eaten.

A tomato that wanted to fulfil it's destiny.......

Have you ever seen such a sight?? A tomato that sprouted on it's own?

Dad had it sitting on his counter to ripen and instead it did this!

He's going to put the whole thing in the ground and see what happens. He also promised to take pictures of the process. How fun it will be if we can pick tomatoes that started from this tomato!

I'm still here!

2008-05-19T12:11:00.000-07:00

I'm still here, I haven't completely abandoned blogging.
I've just been very busy this past week.
First it was Mothers day.
Then there was Bugs Kindergarten orientation.
The school is very small and the teacher was very nice. I haven't been in a grade school in many years but one thing immediately jumped out at me. I turned to husband and asked " Do all grade schools smell the same?" He quickly replied "Yes, I think they do"
Maybe it's that I also went to a small rural grade school, but it smelled just like this one.
This isn't the actual school that Bug will go from 1st to 6th grade at. The district is so small that they combine kindergarten between two of the smaller remote schools.
Bug was shy at first but by the time we were done he had a new friend and a promise for play dates over the Summer.
The next night my dad came up to visit. We had a nice BBQ and Bug was pleading with Papa to stay the night.
Then we had Bugs Preschool graduation the next night. It was set to start at 7pm, we arrived at 6:40pm to find the parking lot over flowing. When we got into the gymnasium it was packed and we ended up in the back... again! argh. It also happened to be close to ninety degrees that day and there was no air conditioning or air flow in the gym. Husband had to go stand at the door so he wouldn't over heat! They did a number of songs and said their ABC's. Bug did so great, he was really hamming it up. I took pictures but I had to zoom way in (since I was standing in the very back!) I have tried and tried to edit the pictures but the kids eyes look like demon children. They aren't red, it's more like they are glowing and I can't get them to look right. Any suggestions?
Saturday my little sister came to visit. She lost her job Friday and needed to get away and just chill out for the day. We sat in the yard chatting, drinking ice tea and watching Bug slip and slide. We don't spend much time together so it was nice hanging out with her for a few hours.
The weather has been awesome this past week. I've been trying to catch up on my gardening. Yesterday was spent planting, weeding and watering.
So now you're all caught up on my life... I'm not sure how good I'll be at blogging through the Summer. I'm going to try and do at least a few posts a week.

Early Mothers Day present

2008-05-09T13:51:00.000-07:00

Bug was adamant that daddy pick him up from daycare yesterday.
He had a surprise for me and didn't want me to see it until he got home.
I'm not sure what the difference was but we indulged him anyway.
He walked through the door with this.....

It's a planter with little sprouts poking through. The card says "I love you" in Bugs hand writing.

One side has Chives and the other Basil. He was so proud of it and knew that mommy would love plants for mothers day.

Speaking of Bug, he lost something a few weeks ago.

His preschool teacher pulled it out! It was very loose, but I was shocked when he told me she pulled it. Kind of pissed off actually, but I'm over it. It would have come out anyway right?

Maybe I was just upset because he wouldn't let ME pull it.

Happy mothers day to all the mommies out there.

Wordless Wednesday ~ Pretty puppy

2008-05-06T20:04:00.000-07:00

I found these while going through a box of my parents pictures. I took them when I was 15, my little cousin Serra putting flowers on my late great dog "Buddie" he passed away a few years ago, but lives on in my heart.

Emotionally exhausted!

2008-05-06T09:44:00.000-07:00

I have been so tired the last few days. Saturday was the service and it went very well. There was just the right amount of people. The weather was gorgeous and every thing went very smoothly.
I spent most of Sunday doing nothing. Yesterday I was just as exhausted but managed to get caught up at work.
Today I am feeling a lot better and will hopefully be getting back onto the blogging band waggon.
One other thing happened this past week that I just can't get out of my head.
A tragedy happened in the family of an old high school friend.
A horrible, horrific event that I can't even fathom.
I haven't spoken to this friend in at least a decade. We used to be very close in high school, but then we drifted apart. I went in a different direction and we just didn't click anymore.
When we ran into each other a decade ago we had a really nice visit. We exchanged phone numbers and the following week I called her to see if she wanted to go to lunch.
She completely blew me off. You know when you are talking to someone and it feels very awkward, you can tell that person just isn't interested in you.
I realized it wasn't meant for us to be friends and I just let it go, even though inside the rejection hurt.
When I heard about the tragedy on the news I was in disbelief that it was her family.
I had spent practically every day at their house over the course of my Sophomore year in high school. I went to church with them every Sunday.
I immediately felt that I should reach out to her in some way. To at least send her a card letting her know how sorry I was.
When I told someone this, their first response was " Didn't she sort of reject you?"
I responded with, "Well yes she did, but I just can't ignore the pain she must be feeling."
I don't expect any sort of response from her. I don't even really feel the need for a response, but I did feel an absolute need to reach out with some kind words.
I have realized how important it is, when dealing with a loss, to have people just say they are sorry they are and that they are thinking of you.

I'm trudging along

2008-04-28T18:18:00.000-07:00

Saturday I went to my parents house to help prepare for the service next Saturday.

Why we decided to have it there I am now questioning.

The house isn't small, but it isn't gigantic either.

And there is no good parking.... at all.

170 acres and no parking.

So our solution is to have everyone park at the neighbors house and get a van to shuttle people down the mile long driveway.

I volunteered my husband to do the chauffeuring.

The day had me feeling like my head was floating above my body.

You know that feeling of " I can't believe I am here and this is happening right now" feeling.

So yesterday I went and looked at a horse that's for sale.

Yes, I know it sounds like a very strange thing to do.

But I needed the distraction.

I needed to do something for me.

I decided not to buy him.

It's just such bad timing.

And here is where I cuss... I hate that stupid f*cking windows movie maker.

I've been working on a slide show for days, I get so frustrated with it.

You know.. in between crying and laughing.. it makes me frustrated.

The end product will be fantastic but I'm being severely anal about the whole thing.

I want life back to normal, but now I don't know what normal is.

Maybe after Saturday...

Earth Day... a tribute

2008-04-22T10:37:00.000-07:00

My step-mom was a champion for our environment, so today on Earth Day I would like to make a tribute to this awesome woman. Her house was off the grid, solar and hydro power. She recycled everything, used bio-fuels and grew organic produce. If we all just did a quarter of what she did, our planet would be better off.

I have been working on a picture slide show for the service and I want to share some of my favorite pictures of her. I probably won't be blogging a lot, it's hard to focus on anything else right now.

My heart is heavy

2008-04-20T09:37:00.000-07:00

Early Friday morning my stepmom lost her long battle with cancer at the very young age of 49.
She was an amazing woman who gave so much to my family.
My dad met her when I was fifteen, she had no children of her own and inherited me, a surly teenager. She took that in stride and loved me as if I was her own.
My dad and her owned a Nursery for seventeen years, creating it from nothing and making it into a very successful business. They worked tirelessly at the Nursery and when they weren't working there, they were working on their land and building their dream home.
During the last year of her life, while battling cancer, she laid every tile in their living room.
She loved nature and her animals, cooking meat for her dogs and cat. Despite the fact that she was vegetarian she learned how to cook salmon and chicken for my dad.
She was an amazing cook who created her own recipes.
In the last few years she learned how to make natural soaps and lotions, selling them at the farmers market and online.
She was there when my son was born, and I'll never forget the look on her face when she saw him for the first time. She turned to me with tears in her eyes and said " Oh Autumn he is just beautiful" and thus began a special bond between grandma and grandson.
When we would visit, she always cooked for us but she would make Bug a special plate with all of his favorite things.
She helped me through labor and birth, holding my hand.
When she passed, I was honored to be at her side, holding hers.

Who has time to blog?

2008-04-15T14:40:00.001-07:00

Especially when it's 80 degrees and gorgeous outside. Yes you heard that right, on Saturday we hit the 80 degree mark with Sunday being slightly cooler but just as beautiful.

We were too busy doing outdoor projects to sit in front of a computer.

Here is a list of our (hubby, mine and Bugs) accomplishments this weekend.

1. mowed the yard and the grass around the shop.

2. Washed my car.

3. Washed husbands Jeep.

4. Swept out the garage.

5. Put up more electric fencing .

6. Tilled the garden (only one pass, the ground was still wet).

7. Fertilized the starts in the greenhouse.

8. Vacuumed out both vehicles.

9. I took the riding mower tires in to have leaks fixed.

10. Husband limbed up a dozen fir trees... and here are the pictures to prove it.

It's important to keep trees close to the house limbed. It helps in wildfire prevention.

It also helps to make our property not as appealing to Cougars.

Last year a Cougar killed one of our little goats. I couldn't get mad at the Cougar, after all it was an easy meal for them and we moved into their neighborhood.

Look at that reach! Husband didn't like these pictures...

See those white lines, that's the electric fence to keep the goats out of this area. They were stripping the trees and killing them. Plus eroding the bank really bad in this area, they liked being close to the house.

Bug liked playing in the branches.

He was having a fun time until daddy got upset with him... and told him not to play in the pitchy branches, near poison oak....

Here's Bugs reaction to getting in trouble.. look at that sad face.

This area was trimmed up a couple years ago.

Husband scared me a couple times, working on steep, rocky ground.

Reaching over his head with a running chainsaw...

This is hims saying "Why are you taking my picture?"

Oh just documenting for the insurance company dear....

By the way, I purchased a new vacuum this weekend. I decided on a Dyson, it's a real sucker and I love it but the damn thing cost more than a pony! Shhhhh don't tell Bug!

The late night visitor...

2008-04-11T20:42:00.000-07:00

Around 12:30am last night Bug busted into our room, doing a little dance and announcing " I have to go potty reaaaallllyyyy bad!"
In a sleepy haze I told him " Well go then!"
He rushed into our bathroom and slammed the pocket door.
I could hear the familiar clang of his potty seat getting positioned on the toilet.
Oh... he has to poop... great, this will take a while.
My Bug takes his own sweet time going number two.
I tried not to fall back asleep, as I knew I would be summoned soon to inspect his cleaning job.
As I laid there hoping he wouldn't take an hour like the last time, I heard him talking to himself.

"Wow, no wonder I couldn't sleep"

At least he wasn't singing this time.....

Catching up.....

2008-04-11T10:20:00.000-07:00

Last night we finally had nice weather. The rain has been bumming me out.

Bug and I spent some time outside, playing hide and seek, swinging, looking under rocks for bugs and checking on our plant starts in the greenhouse. Spring has sprung so I thought I would share some pictures from yesterday.

I haven't had a lot of motivation to blog lately. I've been reading other blogs but not commenting as much and just lethargic about life in general.

The car is fixed and was covered by the warranty. I'm picking up a new vacuum tonight.

Things are looking up.....

And in case anyone is wondering, our ladybugs did not survive the winter inside the house. However I did see several emerging from hibernation last night.

It is supposed to be in the seventies this weekend. I am so excited for Spring!

Would you like cheese with that whine?

2008-04-07T11:38:00.000-07:00

Allow me to whine a little. I haven't been very good about blogging lately. Lot's of personal stuff going on. Not to mention I've been feeling like I'm coming down with a cold for over a week. You know that sort of raw throat, achy neck, and terribly lethargic feeling? I'm to the point I would rather have the cold and get it over with.
To top it off, I went to vacuum this weekend and my vacuum was emitting that hot electrical smell that is a sign of impending doom.
I decided to ignore it and keep vacuuming. It wasn't really doing that great of a job, it didn't seem to be picking much up. I finished vacuuming the whole house, I went to empty the bin only to realize that it in fact didn't pick anything up. Nice, now not only is the carpet still dirty but now the house smells like burnt wires. Anyone recommend a good vacuum cleaner?
Then this morning after I dropped Bug off at daycare I turned up the road to our house and my car started to sputter. Then it died, right there in the middle of the road.
I sat there wondering what I should do, luckily it's a very quiet country road so I didn't have to worry about traffic. I put it in park and started it again. It sputtered a bit and died..... crap.
I put my emergency flashers on and called hubby at work to ask what I should do. It went to voice mail so I sat there cursing.... alone. I tried starting it again and this time it worked fine, so I slowly made my way up the hill and made it home.
I thought husband was silly spending so much on the extended warranty five years ago, I was wrong.... so wrong. Hopefully it's something that is covered and we won't have to spend anything.
I hate being a whiny person, so now that I've let it out, I'll let it go. Besides I hated that damned vacuum anyway so now I have a good excuse to spend money on a new one.
Hmmm... maybe I'll get a new car out of this too. Oh never mind I'm way to cheap for that!